Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Windows and Doors

What exactly is the proper response when someone says, “Well, at least you look young,” after you tell them your age? I said thank you, but was that correct? Was it meant to be a compliment? And how long do I have before people start asking me if I’ve had botox? I mean, seriously, when the hell did I go from being young to simply looking young? Jeez! I guess this was the window of opportunity that everyone kept talking about in college, and it appears that mine may have just slammed shut. They say whenever a door closes a window opens, does that also mean a door opens whenever a window closes? I sure hope so! To be honest, I never really believed in all the hoopla over age. I’ve always felt like things will happen for me when they’re meant to happen. Then during a conversation with my former roommate (who’s a genius, by the way) I realized that maybe the reason I’m having such a hard time “growing up” is because I’ve been pretty mature my whole life. If you’re 25 by the time you’re 10, where does that leave you by the time 25 actually rolls around? Don’t get me wrong, I’ve definitely had my immature and irresponsible moments, but mostly I’ve been on a path much different from a lot of the other people my age. I’ve always had more of a connection with people who are older than me. I wasn’t looking forward to 21 so I could go out and get wasted, I was just glad I was finally going to be able to go everywhere my friends could go. I feel like I grew up really fast, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing, but you do miss out on certain things that may end up causing you some regret later on. It’s easier to get away with things at a certain age, but after a while you should know better and it’s no longer acceptable. That’s where I am now. It’s that constant inner battle of wanting to do things now because I never did them at the appropriate age. I guess I just need to remind myself that everything happens for a reason and we’re all on different paths. Maybe there are certain things I’ve never done, and might never get to do, but I’ve also accomplished a lot for which I often forget to give myself credit. And, at the end of the day, if I really want to do something, I need to just go ahead and do it. Sure it might seem silly to some people, but by not doing it, who am I really hurting other than myself?